This is my first post that is not intended to be controversial but I fully suspect people will have problems with it regardless. That’s fine. We can discuss. I look forward to the lively conversation. But, rather, this was written for the sheer sake of enjoyment as well as an exercise in creativity. My ultimate goal here is to bring you into thought about what you say and why you say it.
I had a terribly fun time collecting these phrases over the past two weeks. Whenever I heard somebody say one or caught myself uttering one I stopped and wrote it down for further reflection.
Additionally, I must say that each explanation is fairly short for the sole reason of space and time conservation. This is an abbreviated list of phrases, also for the sake of time.
- I’m just a human. (credit to Damian Schmitt)
This phrase, if anything, is an excuse for perfection and is absolutely not a justification for screwing up. I substantiate this with the fact that we all share in a divinely similar spiritual nature and are called to perfection. This is known best in Jesus. He was ‘only’ human (obviously perfectly divine as well) but maintained perfection despite His sharing in humanity and being tempted, having walked through pain, suffering, fear and all other human emotions.
- Out of order.
Nothing is “out of order”. If an elevator, for example, were out of order then the particles would be completely and utterly destroyed. This obviously cannot be possible, for if it were the case, the elevator would be in complete nonexistence. It is not even intelligible for something to be known as being in complete chaos and in an absolute state of out of orderliness. Thus, it is rather more proper to say, “The elevator is dysfunctional,” meaning that it is not adequately or efficiently achieving its goal of transportation or of motion. So those ignorant signs that say “out of order” are completely wrong.
- Gingers have no souls.
Whoever wrote this into the script of South Park clearly doesn’t know what a soul actually is. A body is a soul inhabiting matter. A body cannot exist without a soul. The soul is a unifying principle and the soul informs or animates matter. Red heads or ‘gingers’ have a body, are a unified whole, and are able to carry out motion, tasks, animations, etc. Thus, a ginger does have a soul. Get over it.
- God bless America.
I’m glad we are telling God to bless America. Even if we were to merely ask Him to bless America, it’s as if He were going to forget. Even if we are merely praying for God to bless America, it’s as if He were not going to. This just seems like a strange concept to me.
- Be safe.
My mom is infamous for saying this every time I leave the house. Potentially for good reason, knowing my habits, but it’s still an odd thing to say. It’s like she (or any mother that tells their kid to be safe) assumes that I (or we) are going to go out of our way to be reckless. I’m not going to leave the house and be safe just because she reminded me to be safe. I understand and completely appreciate the sentiments behind saying this but it is still a goofy notion to think about on it’s own.
- Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I couldn’t think of anything further from the truth. This leads us down silly roads of relativism: for one person to claim that Rembrandt’s, Da Vinci’s, Monet’s art pieces are the most beautiful artists of all time and for another to claim that art this art is absolutely atrocious. There is an ultimate form of beauty and good art will best attempt to capture it in oils, marble, pastels, crayons, finger paint, clay, etc. Beauty can be looked at objectively and this common phrase distorts that reality.
- History repeats itself. (credit to Kevin Banich)
If history repeated itself then it seems as though the exact same situations would happen over again. Every situation that has ever happened in all of history is just as much different from each other as every snowflake is different from each other. There may be significant similarities in two histories but there are significant similarities in two completely different snowflakes (i.e. frozen water gathered around a particle of dirt that is heavy enough to fall from the sky or whatever).
- God exists. Or God does not exist. (credit to Eckhart Tolle)
Eckhart Tolle conveys my point adequately in his book called The Power of Now, “The word God has become an empty meaning through thousands of years of misuse. I use it sometimes, but I do so sparingly. By misuse, I mean that people who have never even glimpsed the realm of the sacred, the infinite vastness behind the word, use it with great conviction, as if they knew what they are talking about. Or they argue against it, as if they knew what they are denying.” St. Anselm claims that the atheist is a fool because he does not understand what or who God is. This is the same point that Eckhart Tolle seems to be making in the above quotation, none of us know who God is yet we are constantly trying to prove and deny Him.
- Life is not about imitating. (this phrase was brought to my awareness from a tweet by @jamesbrockmeier aka James Brockmeier (who does not agree with the original statement))
This proclamation is just nonsense. Imitation is the goal of life. To manifest an objective truth of how we are meant to live is imitation and should be sought after. There is no reason why imitation (of Saints, Mary, Christ, and other noble figures) should not be attempted unless aimed at wrong goals (i.e. to change one’s personality, to conform to negative influences, etc).
- Trust your instincts.
Yeah, okay, if you’re only an animal. Basing action off pure instinct and feeling is to reduce your cognitive function of your ability to choose, discriminate between two options, to have preference, to have a will of your own to a mere pain versus pleasure reasoning and basis for action. This is what animals do. Not rational animals.
- Smoking causes cancer. (credit to Professor Bill Pedtke) (also I must confess that I am not a smoker but I stand up for the rights of people who smoke)
This is ludicrous yet people say it all the time. If smoking caused lung cancer then all peoples who smoked would then have lung cancer. But this isn’t true. I can name five people off the top of my head who smoke and do not have lung cancer. I can even name an additional five people that have smoked longer than 20 years and don’t have cancer. Let’s get the facts straight: not all people who smoke have cancer. [The basic explanation of a “cause” is that which something cannot be without. Fire causes smoke. Smoke does not exist without fire.] This is because the lungs and immune system, if strong enough, can handle the extracurricular crap in a cigarette. What do I mean? Well, if the lungs are healthy then they can counteract the tar, carcinogens, etc. Just like not all drinkers (not even all alcoholics) have cirrhosis of the liver. So if the lungs are active (well exercised by physical exercise or singing) and fully mature (the age of 18(?)) when a person begins smoking then cancer is relatively sure not to develop past normal levels.
- He’s a smoker/She’s a Jew/He’s black.
I know several people who smoke, a couple of Jewish people, and many black men. They are not smokers, Jews, or blacks. They are people who smoke, a Jewish woman, and black men. To reduce a person to an action, a faith, or a color/ethnicity is incredibly offensive. Acknowledge their innate personhood.
- Does a bear shit in the woods?
Polar bears do not shit in the woods. So, no, not all. (credit to Ross McCauley)
- A tree falls in the woods and no one is around. Is there any sound made?
The tree that falls and hits the ground transfers energy which results in a sound. Duh. Sound is not contingent upon people hearing it. If everyone were deaf there would still be sounds in the world; they would just be unheard. This is a nonsense question.
- ....for God’s sake.
To say, “Oh, for God’s sake, stop doing that,” is indiscernible. God’s sake is in a state of constant perfection and happiness despite our actions. So it is more proper to say, “Oh, for your own sake, stop doing that,” because your sake is in a constant flux as in unavoidable by our existence within time.
If you have any that you think are contribute-able, please comment and share those.
